Day 23: HIT THE RESET BUTTON

Hi everyone! It is Day 23 of our Confidence Boot Camp, and we hope you are learning and practicing all of our great information and tips about increasing your confidence. Today, we are talking about how to “Hit the Reset Button”. Reset techniques are the coping skills that we need to have in our toolbox for the inevitable things that happen every day that cause us any kind stress. They come from the Physical realm of The Chemistry of Confidence.

Yesterday, for example, I had a very busy work schedule that included writing this post for today’s Boot Camp session, editing photographs to go along with it, and seeing clients in my psychotherapy practice. The first thing I felt when I woke up was a little bit of panic. How, I wondered, would I get everything done in time? I was also feeling the beginning of a head cold coming on (which didn’t help), and my son asked me to help him out today as well. My stress level was beginning to skyrocket! I desperately wanted to go to the yoga class that I love on Friday mornings, but I wasn’t sure I should go with all I had on my plate that day. My lizard brain activated and whispered into my ear and said:

“You don’t have time to take care of yourself.”

“You’ll never get everything done if you go to yoga.”

“Don’t go to yoga!”

Fortunately, I recognized that Murphy (my lizard’s name) had sensed I was stressed and, out of her genuine desire to help me, jumped in to save the day. “How kind of her,” I thought (admittedly with a tone of sarcasm). Except that her solution was not what I needed. I needed to do something that would help me cope with my stress, not make it worse.

I needed yoga, and so I told Murph that while I appreciated her, I was going a different direction. I went to yoga, and--guess what--it worked. I left my class calmer, more centered and confident, and managed to do everything I needed to do. This also prepared me for some unplanned and unexpected complications, which always happen. (Murphy’s Law?)

There are many techniques and practices that you can use to reset yourself. I know that every day I need to exercise, eat healthy food AND eat a treat (chocolate anyone?), read good literature (social media doesn’t count), connect with the people I love, and, because I am an introvert, have alone time, even if for only 30 minutes. I have found if I do all of these things every day, I am a much happier and centered person. Also, in my repertoire of coping skills are other techniques that I can grab onto when and if I need them. I can do deep breathing if I’m anxious, grab my camera and go out the door and photograph, hike, do yoga, take a walk around the block, get into my hot tub, or have lunch with a friend. Any and all of these things significantly support my busy and often stressful life.

Here is how to develop your own set of reset techniques:

First, it is important to understand your own daily energy levels. For example, are you a morning or night person? I am a morning person, and I know that if I don’t exercise first thing in the morning, it’s probably not going to happen. Also, consider that some days you will feel more energetic than others.
To ensure that your energy level is where you want it to be, there are some absolutes we all need, such as ensuring you are getting enough regular sleep. This is often the one important thing that we deprive ourselves of most, yet is really one of the most critical things we need every day.
Absolutely nourish your body with healthy food. Refer to Day 3: #donteatcrap
Get some kind of exercise every day. We know by now that the more we move our bodies, the more energy we have.

PRACTICE ASSIGNMENT

There are many ways to make a plan for yourself. Velvet, in her video suggests this:

Open up your childhood “dream closet” where you have stored all of those wonderful, imaginative dreams you had as a child.
Make a list of all of them, regardless of how impossible or daunting some of them may seem. Write them down on a piece of paper and tape it to your bathroom mirror so you can read them every day. Identify the ones that you need to do daily (e.g. exercise, eat healthy, listen to music) and those that you are future-oriented (e.g. go to Italy, learn to speak Spanish, go back to school).
Begin the very next morning with at least one of those of the everyday dreams. As it becomes more comfortable as a daily practice, add another one, and then another one. As you find success with your daily goals, the larger dreams will seem more doable.
Don’t be hard on yourself if there is a day when you can’t do all of them. Focus on those that you can, such as eating one healthy piece of fruit even when you’re on the run and making a pass through McDonald’s!

Why is this so important? There are too many reasons to count.

But here are two: 1) As Velvet says in her video, it is important to have your own set of reset tools to “remind you that there are other things in your life than what you are dealing with in the moment”, and 2) It’s important because if we don’t have these tools we won’t go for our dreams. And if we don’t go for our dreams, life won’t be as much fun or interesting.

So, start now...today. Remember that as with anything new we decide to do, practice makes perfect. And, since perfect is not what we are shooting for, there is no possibility of failure. Your reset techniques are your practice...not anyone else’s. So be kind and gentle with yourself, and just keep trying. We think you’ll be glad you did.

Thanks for joining us today at our Confidence Boot Camp. See you tomorrow!

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